An Improbable Friendship by Anthony David

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This is a difficult book to write about, probably because I am still trying to digest it all for myself, let alone try to share it with anyone else.  The friendship that is chronicled in this book is that which existed for many years between Ruth Dayan, wife of Moshe Dayan, and Raymonda Tawil, Yasser Arafat’s mother-in-law.  Although they were each related to men who were enemies, they themselves were able to strike a bond of friendship and respect because of their common goals and common ideals.  They each believed in the inherent good in all people and that peace could be achieved between Palestinians and Israelis if they were just brought together and allowed to live side by side.  Each worked relentlessly to try to bring this dream into a reality, Ruth by working directly with Palestinian women (helping them to earn money through their weaving) and Raymonda through the media.

What became difficult about this book is the details, which were, as the history of Israel is, quite bloody and controversial.  While I have always been aware of Israel’s displacement of Arabs from their homes during the formative years of the state, this book provides the gory details and describes it in real, human terms.  It is, to say the least disturbing.  It did truly open my eyes to some of Israel’s darkest moments.  On the other hand, I cannot help feeling as though there are some details that are not included, such as the fact that after the U.N. declaration of a 2-state situation in 1948, the Israelis were willing to abide by this but the Arabs were not.  And terrorism is terrorism, no matter what the root of it, and the only true way to solve a problem is to negotiate it through.  The story, as it is written, portrays Palestinians as the underdogs and I think the bias in the writing is a fault in the book.  It is so clearly slanted to the left that in the writing of the story of these 2 very brave women, the author actually alienates readers – and probably the very readers he wants to sway.

The book does highlight how the female perspective on the situation is often different from the male one.  Ruth and Raymonda were able to disagree about many things, but they always found common ground and started back from this.  Their priority was always to fall back onto humanism and love.  I firmly believe that if women were in charge, we’d be able to reconcile a solution to the Middle East and find a way to make peace.  I think leaving out testosterone and “honor” would do the world a service.

I definitely learned a lot about the history of Israel, the complexity of the political quagmire that remains there, but also how one can spin events in many ways to work to one’s purpose.  I think too much of the latter was done in this book and this may have caused what I understood to be the “mission” of this book to backfire.

 

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